It has been four and a half months since Gracie had her last seizure. Tom and I are no longer on edge waiting and watching for the next one. We have graduated on to some small freedoms. We let Gracie be alone for small periods of time to play by herself. For the longest time, if Gracie was out of sight, I worried that she was having a seizure. This small freedom is a chance for her to foster some independence and a chance for us to trust that things are alright even if we are not watching her every minute. It helps that she likes to sing and talk to her toys as she plays. As long as the singing, talking and babbling continue, she is not having a seizure.
I guess it comes down to a balancing act of wanting to protect her but not be over-protective and to want her to grow up to become an independent person but to realize that she has limitations. As Gracie grows up and becomes more independent and in control of herself, I want to know that we have prepared her as best we can. One small thing that we do is introduce her to public transportation. There is a good possibility that Grace will not be able to get and maintain a driver's liscence. Her method of transportation will most likely not be to hop into a car and zip off to wherever. We are introducing her to public transportation so she will be aware of it; know how to use it and not to be afraid of it.
All this talk of independence...the reality of it is that Gracie is still our sweet little three year old who is a long way off from doing much on her own. But we have hope.
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